Posted by: eightweleve | September 23, 2009

on values

i am realizing more and more how my values are being refined in this season. and how different they are than the world’s values. i suppose i have never been able to communicate my values as clearly before, because they always seemed so overwhelming. the few times i have stopped to really try to pin them down, i have had a difficult time. i feel like i have a pretty good feel for my overall worldview, but when it comes to actually defining the specific values by which i am learning to live my life – i have found it hard to articulate. i remember when sally and i were going through pre-marital counseling and were asked to being to define our values. it was really tough. honestly, i dont even remember how we responded. i just remember feeling relieved, because we had a pretty equal value system (i.e. we are compatible). it is only recently that i am noticing my values, and mainly because they stand in opposition to those around me.

with all of the amazing Kingdom things happening in Norman, I am finding myself more and more wanting to be able to be in Norman full time. I was even dialoging with Jesus about it this morning; just asking that if He really wants me to be here, then He would open something up for me – that would still allow me to provide for my family. so, until that doors opens, i am content in my current situation. but through this interaction i am seeing how much i value the Kingdom, over ‘normal life’ – and how much i value serving faithfully in my local church community. i am not saying that the Kingdom can’t happen where i am at now. quite the opposite really. but in this instance, because normcom is focused on the city of Norman, and I work in OKC – there is just a little disconnection. i love what i do. i love the people i work with. i am really fortunate. i just wish i was in Norman…..yeah, tension.

the other value that is ‘showing’ in my life right now is family. maybe a better way to say it is family has the second highest priority in my life. currently i am feeling tension in my life regarding my high value of family verses the world’s highest value, work (aka. the pursuit of money, power, control). i dont necessarily feel overwhelmed with my job. my work load is just going to be more significant over the next month and a half or so. i am looking at some pretty consistent overtime, in which i will have to sacrifice time with my wife and eight month old boy. it is what it is. and i get that, and am totally onboard with doing what is necessary to do the job well and on time. but it also highlights how important family is to me. rarely do i have to work overtime or on the weekends, unless it is for my contract work – which is a choice of mine. but even when i do, i can see my high value of family showing itself. i am not going to be that guy that is a work-a-holic, or puts his career over his family. it just will not happen. ever.

i dont really have a point to all of this, other than just using this post as a place to document my thoughts. and as sally and i are learning how to doing this whole family thing, i am sure that further defining these values will prove beneficial in the long run. when i get it all figured out, ill let you know…actually ill probably just post it here.

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